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Panzerchrist: Battalion beast

07/09/06  ||  Lord K Philipson

Maybe we should interview nice guy Rasmus of Panzerchrist again and ask him what the fuck happened here…

I have been looking forward to “Battalion beast” more than a nympho looks forward to an armada of cocks. As mentioned, I have absolutely no fucken idea what happened to Panzerchrist since they released their fucken astonishing “Roomservice” album a few years back. That muthafucken disc is bound to be a death metal classic if enough people gets around to hearing it. But this review is not about “Roomservice”. I think.

The “Roomservice” album (plenty of fuck’s, this review is about that piece after all) was 100 per-fucken-cent groovy death metal. No matter where you put it, you could see groove written all over it in fucken neon letters. Together with a tank, a logo and the album title, ofcourse.

And here comes “Battalion beast”, the very album that’s supposed to kick said album’s Danish arse… How did it go?

Well… Well… Well fucken well…

What the fuck did happen to these guys? That question just won’t fucken vanish. I have no idea what the Panzer’s been thru, but what I do know is the following: they sure abandoned the sound they had on “Roomservice”. And I’m as suprised as said whore discovering the armada of cocks is actually nothing but a rowboat full of cum.

Call it evolution, I call it a damn fucken shame as they had it all together on “Roomservice”. Whoever is responsible for the music on this disc pretty much completely OD’d on bands in corpsepaint while writing it. There’s black metal riffage all over this. None of that was found on “Roomservice”. What was to be found on that one, though, was Reno’s insanely awesome fucken drumming. It’s here as well, so that’s at least something that matches up with said disc. This guy must eat, breathe and shit doublebass 24/7. But Reno’s magic behind the kit is not doing this album alone. As if the change of style wasn’t enough, Bo’s trademark growl has been split something like 50/50 with his way of black metal shrieks. I don’t like it that much. I’m not only referring to the black metal-ish vocals, I mean the whole package. I mean the “new” Panzerchrist.

Sure, they are executing some serious metal of death on this album as well, it just lacks everything in that death metal that the last album was jammed with. “Battalion beast” puzzles me coz I expected another awesome full-on death metal assault a’la “Roomservice”.

I didn’t get it.

I sure as fuck didn’t get it. But I think I got a typo in “battalion” on the fucken album cover. Look closely. That’s always something.

7 dissapoined lord’s out of 10. 7 might not be a low score, but it’s definitely low for a band like Panzerchrist.

By the way, their site is a fucken mess and they have had 4 million line-up changes during the recording of this CD, so the information below as far as members goes might not be all that correct. But you shouldn’t worry your little head about that. It’s not fucken important. Now, leave.

  • Information
  • Released: 2006
  • Label: Neurotic records
  • Website: www.panzerchrist.com
  • Band
  • Bo Summer: vocals
  • Frederik O’Carroll: lead guitars
  • Michael Enevoldsen: bass
  • Rasmus Henriksen: rhythm guitars
  • Reno Kiilerich: drums
  • Tracklist
  • 01. The lean black cruisers
  • 02. The Gods they do not give us long
  • 03. He is dead who will not fight
  • 04. Infants’ Graves
  • 05. Weep no more
  • 06. Flame of the Panzerchrist
  • 07. Lumps of rotting clay
  • 08. War in the north
  • 09. The spirit of soldiers
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